This is the first in a series of articles recommending reading material, whether you're a client of mine or not. In this entry we'll look at Steve Peters' brilliantly simple mind management model that helps to understand why we process the world in certain ways, how that might be limiting us, and what we can do to change it.

Details: The Chimp Paradox: The Mind Management Programme for Confidence, Success and Happiness by Professor Steve Peters, Ebury Publishing, 2012

In a sentence: A model that explains why our brains can hold us back, and how to work with it to find the results you’re looking for

Tone: Accessible and conversational, but with a scientific background

Who is it for: Anyone who finds fear gets in the way of making the changes they want to make

I first encountered the "Chimp Paradox" several years ago from a former colleague. I was going through a period of transition, and it was one I had given a lot of thought to. I knew I was capable of making the change; the change had a clear, rational logic, and I had put in all the work I could possibly need to follow through with it. On every level I should have felt like I was doing the right thing.

But something was holding me back. It felt as though there was no amount of work I could do that would reassure me I was doing the right thing, even though, rationally, I knew I was. It meant that I often found myself procrastinating. I would refuse to make the final changes I needed to make, even though I knew I needed to make them. I felt stuck in a situation I wasn't happy with because I couldn't work up the courage to make the very small, very necessary changes required to resolve it. When I told my friend this, they commented, "that'll be your Chimp talking."

“I felt stuck in a situation I wasn't happy with because I couldn't work up the courage to make the very small, very necessary changes required to resolve it”

At the time this meant nothing to me, but when they explained where it came from I checked the book out, and felt it was speaking directly to me. Suddenly the reason for why I was holding back made so much more sense, and it came from "The Chimp Paradox".

The Chimp Paradox suggests that my fear stemmed from my "Chimp". The book takes the complex science of how the brain works and essentially "dumbs it down" for laymen such as myself. From Peters background as a Consultant Psychiatrist with an expertise in how the mind functions, he provides a model with a focus on ease-of-consumption, breaking the brain down in to seven parts, and then focusing on just three, the Frontal, Limbic, and Parietal. The book simplifies these parts into the Human, the Chimp, and the Computer, making it easier to understand without needing to learn complex cognitive labels.

The argument that Peters provides is that the Human is us, where our rational thoughts live. The Chimp, on the other hand, is essentially a second brain, an emotional machine that thinks independently of us. It thinks only in feeling, meaning it takes perceived slights personally, and jumps to conclusions based on very little information. It is irrational, paranoid, and thinks in extreme terms. And, seemingly worst of all, it can not be prevented altogether, because it's not actually a part of what we consider to be "us".

The Chimp serves a very important role in our lives, though. By being so judgmental, so irrational, it serves to keep us out of danger, which is it's primary motivation. It is looking to keep us safe for the continuation of our species. It means if we were in the wild and saw a predator approaching, we wouldn't waste time evaluating what the potential outcome would be. The Chimp would take over and make sure we run, now. It is a critical function in how we process the world and not one we would want to do without.

“The Chimp serves a very important role in our lives, though. By being so judgmental, so irrational, it serves to keep us out of danger, which is it's primary motivation. It is looking to keep us safe for the continuation of our species.”

The issue arises in how and when the Chimp interferes in our decision making process. The Chimp doesn't possess the rational tools to evaluate based on logic, so is quick to presume the worst in every situation. That can feel unsafe, and given the Chimp's primary focus is to keep us safe, that is a problem. It’s easy to see how our nervous system responses - fight, flight, freeze, and fawn - might kick in at this point.. The result is that we end up with a feeling that tells us what we are about to do isn't safe and should be avoided. So, much of the time, we do.

The book goes on to explain how to manage your Chimp, offering simple tips like naming it and talking directly to it when you feel its presence. Based on the minimal exposure you may have to this concept based on one short book suggestion, this likely sounds a little odd. But as someone who has tried it, I have personally found it works. Just being able to say "I think that's my Chimp talking" is something that removes yourself from the feelings that may be overwhelming your decision making process. It then becomes much easier to allow the “Human”, our rational brain, to take back over.

“Just being able to say "I think that's my Chimp talking" is something that removes yourself from the feelings that may be overwhelming your decision making process.”

This has led to a regular inner dialogue during times of stress and overwhelm, where I might say, “Thanks, Chimp, for trying to protect me right now. Thankfully this isn't a big decision and we aren't in any risk, so I don't need your input at the moment. But when I am in more imminent danger, that's your time to step in". As a parent, it's almost like de-escalating an overwhelmed child. I provide the Chimp reassurance that I have it in control, and gradually I feel those irrational feelings of angst disappear, and my rational decision making process is able to take over again.

As with all books I will suggest in this series, what works for you may be different from what works for me. There is no single, cut-and-dried approach to making change that will work for everyone. However, the simplicity of this book - turning complex cognitive functions into an easily understood model, even for children (and I know people who have taught their children about “Chimpy” to help them manage anxiety) - makes it one of my go-to methods for overcoming fear and doubt. If you do find yourself restricted, or even stuck, for reasons you don’t fully understand, this book is worth checking out.

Top Three Takeaways:

1. Fear keeps us safe, but can be unhelpful: Avoiding unnecessary risks is our brain’s way of protecting us from danger, but it isn’t always accurate in assessing how dangerous a situation really is.

2. Fear of change is part of human evolution and can’t be cut out altogether: The key to meaningful change is to work with your fear, not against it. Embrace it as a natural part of the process.

3. Labelling your “chimp” helps to gain control of it: By recognising when your “chimp” is becoming unhelpfully active and identifying those feelings, you can better manage and overcome them.

Has the idea of overcoming your fears got you excited for the future? If so, check out my Services page to see how I might be able to help you take the next step!